*July 2018*

*Storytelling is about finding my own story by connecting all the complex and messy parts of my life and still managing to value the entirety of the journey so far. Are you ready to walk with me? I'm familiar with this question. On the surface of my soul boat where the waves crash and I am called upon to sit in the uncomfortableness–I hold on to the mast, for an unwavering knowing exists that this moment too will pass.*

Successful autoethnography recognizes the symbiotic relationship between culture and people. It draws out the interconnectivity between the self and the wider social and political issues, through personal stories and narratives (Chang 2016, p. 46; Ellis 2004, p. 19). The process is one of collaboration that works with, for, and through participants to uncover meaning from the individual and collective experiences.

Storytelling is an established medium, open to multiple audiences and a familiar tradition for Sikhs. Sakhis (stories) on the lives of the Gurus and Sikhs during and after the Gur ¯ uship period are a ¯ popular form of engagemen<sup>t</sup> with Sikhi and Sikh history across all ages, in both the home (private) and gurduara (public) spaces, and more recently across continents through social media (Murphy 2012). A contemporary example is the translation of the precolonial text of the Suraj Prakash. Jvala Singh, a PhD student at the University of British Columbia, summarizes chapters of the text into English for his podcast, the Suraj Podcast. The original written text is in Braj Bhasha<sup>14</sup> with significant use of Sanskrit words in Gurmukhi script. The translation allows the key message of the Suraj Prakash

<sup>13</sup> 'Apunae Jeea Janth Prathipaarae || Jio Baarik Maathaa Sanmaarae ||' (Guru Arjan, M5, M ¯ ajh 36, GGS, p. 105).¯

<sup>14</sup> Language descended from Shauraseni Prakrit and commonly viewed as a western dialect of Hindi and usually written in the Devanagari script (Encyclopaedia Britannica 2009).

to be shared with a wider audience who may not be learned in Braj Bhasha and Sanskrit, as well as reclaiming the stories that make up the text (Singh 2020a).

The janam-sakhis (the birth stories of Guru N¯ anak) viewed as "interpretive and didactic texts" ¯ provide the reader with a specific overarching take-home message as opposed to a historical narrative (Johnson 2013). The emphasis placed in retelling these stories varies through the publisher's choice of design, color, imagery, and language and the voice and context placed by an orator. Crafting stories requires the skill to adapt writing style and good discernment as to the level of detail and depth, in particular when writing for a young audience or outsiders of the community (Khalsa 2018). In addition, when retelling popular works like the janam-sakhis it is important not to lose the spirit of the original author.

Designing autoethnographic research requires placing equal "importance on intellect/knowledge and aesthetics/artistic craft" (Adams et al. 2015, p. 25). The intention is for the key points to impact as wide an audience as possible and stimulate change. Therefore, choosing the most e ffective methodology and attaining proficiency in the chosen form of data collection is as important as acquiring and perfecting the skills to convey the findings in the chosen medium, e.g., writing, dance, performance, etc.

#### *3.6. Transformative–Speaking Truth to Power*

Information and knowledge from research are utilized in problem solving, decision making, and creating new understanding. The outcome and narrative of a publication are influenced by who defines and determines the focus of the research and their particular interests and problems. Autoethnography as a transformative research method acknowledges this embeddedness of self because it allows the researcher, in a tangible way, to understand and be aware of their role in creating and shaping knowledge. Transformation "requires vulnerability, fosters empathy, embodies creativity and innovation, eliminates boundaries, [and] honors subjectivity" (Custer 2014). The transformative potential in autoethnography originates from self-reflection and self-analysis on the part of the researcher, participant, and reader (Chang 2016; Chase 2018). It is not a research method for the fainthearted. It requires courage to deep dive into old, unclaimed emotions and seek clarity on the cultural and familial patterns that are the blueprint to how we see ourselves.

The Sikh model of sovereignty grows from a union between the institutions of sabad Guru, ¯ the Guru in the form of musical word as found in the GGS, and a doctrine of combined temporal ¯ (miri) and spiritual (piri) authority. Transformation is through the contemplation-exegesis of the lived experience through a lens of gurbani. For example, Asa Ki Var<sup>15</sup> (Ballad of Hope), one of 22 vars recorded in the Guru Granth Sahib, is sung every morning in gurduaras and homes of Sikhs ¯ around the world. This is a bani, a fixed prayer, that strongly challenges the "religious hypocrisy, hegemonic structures and stereotypes prevailing in the human consciousness and the society at large" (Sikh Research Institute 2014). The bani subverts and critiques everyday common "socio-cultural ills, ritualism, and customs" facilitating reflexivity in the reader to their own beliefs and practices (The Guru Granth Sahib Project 2020).

For Sikhs, a spiritual faith practice and social political involvement are not mutually exclusive. Speaking truth to power and allying with the powerless is a cornerstone of Sikhi. Examples commonly conveyed between generations through the medium of storytelling include the ninth Sikh Guru's ¯ stance against the state's policy of denying Kashmiri brahmins their right to practice their religion and (Bhai) Kanhaiya serving water indiscriminately to the wounded soldiers from both sides in the battle of Anandpur Sahib in 1704.

More recently, following migration and settlement to diverse conditions outside Punjab, Sikhs have sustained and adapted their faith within new environments, meeting the challenges of assimilation by advocating and raising awareness of Sikh issues and rights in the wider society. Examples include

<sup>15</sup> Also referred to as Asa Di Var.

removing restrictions on wearing the turban in the work environment and exemption from wearing protective headgear while riding motorbikes or bicycles (Spennemann 2020).

Yet to sustain such a noble endeavor requires constant wakefulness and dedication. A practice of reflexivity to account for our own influence, privilege, and relationship to power relative to the *other* is as important as critiquing the wider cultural norms, experiences, and practices, both as a researcher and as a Sikh. Issues include gender preference as witnessed in the practice of sex-selective abortions, colorism, casteism when seeking a partner, or blinkeredness when it comes to standing with and alongside survivors of sexual abuse and communities that suffer from structural racism.

#### **4. Final Thoughts**

Professor Puran Singh, a poet, philosopher, and scientist, writes that for Sikhs, "Our history is of the soul, all its events are of the soul. All truth for us is personal. We have not to prove it, we have to stand witness to it in our soul" (Fischer 2012, p. 128). With a sizable debate around authentic and traditional ways of practicing and interpreting faith, an autoethnographic approach offers insight from a lived experience on what is authentic, i.e., "a direct and immediate expression of [a person's] essence" (Lindholm 2007, p. 2). Gurmat vichhar and autoethnography both use the lived experience in the sense-making process, ye<sup>t</sup> do not solely rely upon it in understanding the world at large.

To write by foregrounding personal experience without accusations of 'narcissism' requires a process of getting to know all the facets of self (Coffey 1999; Roth 2009). In Sikhi this includes reflexivity through the lens of Gurbani. In autoethnography this involves reflexivity on place and privilege in society. Reflexivity is critical. Most often the questions we ask, and the narratives we create in telling the complicated stories of others, reveal more about ourselves as authors. Consciously or unconsciously we choose our positions (hero vs. victim), numb out our triggers, and work with what fits best and does not make us too uncomfortable. World history has repeatedly shown this is especially true when mainstream voices speak for minority voices.

In contrast, autoethnography attempts to walk in 'the shoes of the other' while simultaneously acknowledging that it is still 'my feet in their shoes'. The writing of stories in autoethnography is a weaving of both lived experience and theory (Ellis 2004; Spry 2001). Stories provide a richer text to counter essentialist simplified and homogenized representation of cultures that too often find their way into essential reading lists.

In the Sikh tradition "the stories of one's ancestors makes their descendants good children"<sup>16</sup> and, like indigenous culture, are used to pass on experiential knowledge and history. Autoethnography, with its many places of synergy with Sikhi, also believes in the power of storytelling. Despite the time and effort placed to convey legitimacy and validity among mainstream methods, the works speak for themselves. For someone who is navigating to be unapologetically herself in all spaces, using autoethnography bridges my study of gurbani kirtan in a way that does not separate out my ancestral form of sense making.

**Funding:** This research received no external funding.

**Acknowledgments:** I acknowledge the many before me that have paved the way, shown courage, and lived wholeheartedly. I acknowledge the invisible matrix that supports my unfolding, as I am gently carried like a leaf in the breeze. I acknowledge the one with whom I am fortunate to create 'clouds' of clarity in this life.

**Conflicts of Interest:** The author declares no conflict of interest.

<sup>16</sup> Babaaneeaa kehaaneeaa puth saputh karaen. (Guru Amar D ¯ as, R ¯ amkal ¯ ¯ı 10, GGS, p. 951)
