*3.5. Theme 5: Attachment and Relationship between the Mothers and Their Children during the First 1000 Days of Their Children's Lives*

The participants discussed their attachment to and relationship between themselves and their child, as seen in the following sub-themes.

3.5.1. Sub-Theme 5.1: Attachment and Relationship between the Mothers and Their Children during Pregnancy

The participants shared their initial responses when they found out they were pregnant: "I was happy" (Participant 5), and "I was thrilled. I was very glad" (Participant 10). More than half of the participants experienced various negative emotions: "First, I panicked. Thought ... 'I already have a child and circumstances are not favorable" (Participant 18). This study revealed the strong gender preference of many of the participants, and their emotions regarding gender: "Excited, and the day I found out it was a girl, then I was even more happy" (Participant 6), whereas Participant 12 stated: "When I found out it was a girl it was too late already . . . I was actually very angry".

Several participants considered abortion or adoption: "In the first place, I wanted an abortion ... " (Participant 4), and Participant 17 shared: "I told myself, 'I am going to let the child be adopted by other people'".

Most participants expressed positive thoughts and emotions towards their unborn baby when they felt the movement of the baby: "I was very happy about the kicks. And to see on the sonar how he was moving and carrying on. It was beautiful. It was nice" (Participant 4), and "I've bonded with him while I was pregnant" (Participant 2). Additionally, many participants described how they interacted with their unborn child: "If I was alone with him and he kicked me, then I talked to him. And I listened to music, always with the phone, then I put the phone next to me . . . " (Participant 2).

3.5.2. Sub-Theme 5.2: Attachment and Relationship between the Mothers and Their Children from Birth to Two Years

The participants described their initial response towards their baby after birth: "I was in love with him from day one. That moment when they put him in my arms, I was in love with the child, until now" (Participant 7). Some participants recalled their immediate interactions, as voiced: "When she was lying there after her birth, I played with her or sang for her" (Participant 1). For two participants, the birth of their children created a sense of responsibility and motivation: "Then after that [the child's birth], then I thought to myself, 'I must stand out a bit' and I did stand out for her" (Participant 14).

During the time-period from birth up to two years, many participants expressed their positive responses: "You have that bond with your child" (Participant 8) and "I was very attached to her" (Participant 9). However, some participants experienced negative emotions or thoughts at times: "I don't feel up to baby today" (Participant 11), and " ... can't the child die or something, throw the child away" (Participant 17).

Numerous participants mentioned that their child constantly wanted to be with them with regard to attachment and the relationship from their child's side: "If I am not with her, then she cries. She was very close to me. I could not walk away ... she looked for me" (Participant 1). Two participants distinctively described their children's positive responses and attachment towards them: "And she always clung, grabbed and said, 'Mommy', then grabbed me and held onto me" (Participant 8).
