**6. Conclusions**

In this article, I have discussed how pilgrims, who have fulfilled the fifth pillar of their faith, relate to a particular religious ethos that they are expected to embrace, negotiate, and practice within the social spaces they inhabit. On the basis of my observations and conversations with Moroccans, both pilgrims and their family members, friends and other non-pilgrims, I have argued that, just like everybody else, the everyday lives of pilgrims are laden with ambiguities and contradictions. There are several contradictions between, on the one hand, how a pilgrim is expected to behave in a religious moral register and, on the other, the reality of his or her actual behavior and daily interactions with others. Furthermore, as a major event in the lives of Muslims, the Hajj does not only affect the millions of pilgrims who actually make the journey, but also their friends and relatives who vicariously experience the occasion through them. Therefore, the relationships between

<sup>6</sup> Buitelaar, personal communication (15 October 2019).

pilgrims and their social networks after the Hajj are likely to change, in complex and varied ways, based on their new religious and social status.

While my Moroccan interlocutors recognized that pilgrimage to Mecca can have certain transformative properties on moral and ethical self-formation of returning pilgrims, they do not always consider the outcome to be perfect or lasting. Thus, my research reveals that the construction of a virtuous self and piety is far from straightforward in the everyday lives of pilgrims. Despite the aspirations and manifestly sincere efforts made by returned pilgrims, there is a general realization—among my interlocutors—that the performance of the Hajj is no guarantee, per se, of a life transformation and an elevation to a higher religious standard. It seems, from the research, that the lived experiences of pilgrims are rather marked with complexities and ambivalences—all of which are rooted in human imperfection and conditioned by the social context in which pilgrims live.

The narratives of pilgrims indicate this complexity in their struggle to remain on the right path of piety and straying from that path. The complexity can also be seen in the responses of family members and friends to the newly elevated pilgrim which reveal some social responses when expectations placed on pilgrims are not fulfilled. The humorous anecdotes targeting the pilgrim who remains unreformed operates with wit and mild satire to indicate a community acceptance, and maybe gentle mockery of, the failure to live up to the expectation of total moral transformation. Similarly, the denial of the deferential title of h. ajj or ¯ h. ajja to those whose conduct disappoints can act as a corrective, a puncturing of ¯ hubris of those who prize their title above their religious virtue; such acts also subtly assert the importance of the proper comportment of the h. ajj or ¯ h. ajja by withholding the title from ¯ those who seem not to merit the honor.

To sum up, if piety, religious self-fashioning and conviction constitute one aspect of what pilgrims strive to achieve, post-Hajj, imperfection, uncertainty, and ambivalence are undeniably competing elements of the everyday lives they live. Self-perceived failure is, in many cases, part and parcel of religious practice and experience. To navigate, or negotiate the complexities of life as it is lived, while still maintaining a sense of striving for spiritual improvement, is a laudable religious pathway according to many pilgrims. However, it is also the case that to accept human frailty and ye<sup>t</sup> sustain a religious endeavor, even if not perfectly realized, could provoke a sense of failure, which might, in turn, militate against that sustained religious practice. A possible reconciliation of these conflicting positions seems to be a recognition that spiritual improvement is the target, rather than perfection, and this allows pilgrims to navigate the ambiguities of daily life as they find them.

**Funding:** This research was funded by the Netherlands Organization for Scientific Research (NWO) gran<sup>t</sup> number: 360-25-150.

**Informed Consent Statement:** Informed consent was obtained from all subjects involved in the study.

**Conflicts of Interest:** The author declares no conflict of interest.
