3.3.3. Impact

When it came to discussions around impact, because the focus of the questionnaire was on the perceived benefits to the practitioners rather than their participants, most of the responses and subsequent discussion were around the impact on practitioners. However, at least some of that impact was expressed as an empathic appreciation of participants' development and the inspiration that this brought:

The participants' enjoyment and seeing their creative voice and ideas develop as the session goes on. Also how their confidence grows and individual characters open up due to their excitement. (Q-2).

Seeing the participants (and their parents/carers) grow in confidence and become more open-minded as the sessions continue, is a real inspiration. (Q-1)

• Fun

Closely related to this, the atmosphere of fun and enjoyment which characterises many participatory musical contexts was recognised as a significant part of what makes the work satisfying:

I enjoy working with young people, particularly early years participants as their behaviour makes me laugh and smile and gives me relief from what can be a challenging profession. (Q-2)

The willingness to explore music at the most basic level—enjoyment. I find that after these classes I am always smiling and the children are happy to try new things and ideas. (Q-3)

Being part of these projects has allowed me to see the fun in music again. I have had the chance to see people playing or using their voices in uninhibited ways, even under challenging circumstances and within the contexts of complicated lives. Seeing how much people enjoy making music and feel proud of what they can do is great, and it is very satisfying to observe changes in participants' confidence and skill over longer periods of time. (Q-4)

Again, these participatory settings were often contrasted with the perfectionist culture of the conservatoire, especially in terms of their accessibility and capacity for inclusion:

Being reminded of the enjoyment music can bring in a setting without the elitism and pressure of conservatoire. Cultural benefit of inclusion and social connections being made. (Q-2)

It reminds me that music is for all and to be enjoyed. Sometimes I forget this with the technical demands of playing. (Q-3)

• Social Connection

Respondents also spoke of the ways in which the development and "performance" of a range of different musical relationships impacted on them greatly:

The most rewarding thing is the personal joy that I get from connecting with people through music. Getting to know people, not necessarily through speaking to them, is fascinating. (Q-1)

I really enjoy working alongside similarly minded musicians who believe music should be accessible and enjoyable for as many people as possible. (Q-2)

• Mutual Recovery

Some talked about "alienation" from more formal practices as underpinning their motivation, and for them, involvement in participatory music practices was effectively a way of "recovering" some of their own mental health which they felt had suffered through the intense experience of conservatoire training:

As someone with a mental health condition, I find that it is just as beneficial for me as the participants. I get so much out of group music-making and through community music, I have been able to discover skills I have that I never thought were there. (Q-1)

Psychologically I find it reduces my anxiety as I am not constantly surrounded by the pressures and competitiveness of conservatoire and I have a setting where I can simply enjoy making others happy with my music and creating without pressure or strict constraints. (Q-2)

• Confidence

As one way of gently subverting the "hotshot" mentality of professional musicians who are "often brought up short when they begin playing chamber music [because] nothing has prepared them to attend to others" (Sennett 2012, p. 13), encounters with participatory music can reveal new psychological dimensions to being musical, especially in terms of general musical confidence:

Since being involved with participatory projects, I have noticed that my confidence as a musician has grown. I no longer feel the same need for perfection and I am much more likely to voluntarily join in with singing in other contexts. (Q-4)

• Musical

A key insight from this study was also the impact on practitioners' own musicianship arising from involvement in participatory music. Being able to access the relational, participatory and fun dimensions of music in more presentational performances can be transformational:

Instead of aiming for a "musical ideal" in rehearsals at the cost of offending fellow musicians (something I'm ashamed of from my early years straight out of college!) I now focus on the social interactions and relationships with my colleagues—I believe this has made rehearsals a more positive experience for all and resulted in better musical communication—it also means that my current musical projects are not only musically fulfilling but are also built upon mutual respect and as a result I feel much happier in my career and I feel all the projects I'm involved in are now 'going somewhere. (Q-9)

I am more comfortable performing: if you can persuade a room of 250 nurses to sing, an oratorio is a slightly less daunting prospect! (Q-6)

My ability to improvise parts or adapt parts is better, and [my ability to] loop around a section or whatever it is you need to accompany is much better from having led choirs. Specifically leading choirs makes me a better accompanist, and it makes me much better at feeling the speed and showing the pulse, knowing the pulse. (FG-3)

• Aural Memory and Improvisation

Again confirming previous findings (Ascenso 2016, pp. 21–22), there were specific perceived benefits to musicians' aural memory and improvisation skills:

This aural memory thing is really specific—it's a skill that you didn't have as a musician from three years of conservatory [training] but you got it from doing this; that's really pertinent. (FG-3)

I teach in Early Years settings. I have to memorise the music and I have to know how to improvise because it could mean, say when I want happy music now I have to go, 'yay, I'll play you some happy music.' So then I have to be able to improvise and I have to be able to memorise which is something that I've never had to do with college. So then it's something that I need to do. (FG-6)
