Self-Care Practices at Community Centers: Motherhood in Later Life in Urban Taiwan

Abstract

In current times that emphasize active aging, older adults are often encouraged to participate in interest classes at community centers. Adopting an ethnographic research approach to understand the subjectivities of older mothers, this paper not only sees community centers as a space for older adults for taking interest classes, but also as an infrastructure that defines relationship values. This paper examines the motivations of older mothers in urban Taiwan who have established a routine at a community center. By emphasizing the public space, that is, the values indoctrinated at the community centers, this paper investigates how community center activities offer self-care practices for older women, and how these women embody motherhood by taking care of themselves. This paper expands the notion of motherhood by investigating the subjectivities of older mothers as well as the effects of the global aging discourse on them. This study of urban Taiwan sheds light on understanding the subjectivity of aging mothers in other East Asian cities. The data of this paper were collected through participant observations at community centers, in-depth interviews, and analysis of newspaper archives.

1. Introduction

The World Health Organization (WHO) released the “Active Ageing” policy framework in 2002. The concept of active aging aims to extend life expectancy and quality of life by encouraging older adults to continue participation in social life (World Health Organization 2002). In Taiwan, the government encourages the social participation of older adults by subsidizing non-profit organizations to operate community centers that target relatively healthy older adults (Hsu and Chen 2019). Most of the participants are older women, who are no longer required to grandparent children and have free time during the day. The regular presence of these older women at the community centers piqued my interest in their subjectivity. Why do they go to the community center every day? What meanings do they find at the community center? And how do the routines and meanings shape their subjectivity as well as their mothering practices?

Recent studies of aging subjectivities have examined how older adults receive, adapt to, and negotiate with the aging ideals (Buch 2015, 2018; Danely 2014, 2017; Lamb 2017). Building on the scholarship of aging subjectivities, this paper furthers the discussion by examining how the aging experience is shaped by gender roles in an East Asian cultural context. This paper selects Taiwan as a field study not only because of its geographical location in East Asia but also because of its demographic trends as well as its changing familial norms. Taiwan will become a “super-aged” society in 2026, which means 20% of the population will be people 65 years or older (Executive Yuan 2022). James Hsueh (2023) has noted that the Taiwanese younger generations often see marriage and childbearing as economic burdens, and the marriage rate and fertility rate have been declining over the past 30 years. Nevertheless, familism does not completely fade away—filial obligation and respect for older adults are still highly valued in the society (Lin and Huang 2016). Frank Wang (2014) has also found that familism is a dominating ideology in current social policy in Taiwan. This study of urban Taiwan will shed light on other East Asian societies because Taiwan is perceived as having both traditional and modern culture; this cultural feature is also found in other neighboring cities. This paper examines the experience of married women in an East Asian patrilineal society with the transformation of the power and authority of women during their life course, from daughter-in-law to mother and then mother-in-law.

Qualitative research on motherhood in later life, or broadly on intergenerational relationships, has taken on two major directions. First, scholars have found that married women in later life experience intergenerational disharmony or ambivalence with their adult children (Danely 2014; Fingerman et al. 2004; Spitze and Gallant 2004). Alfred Hu (2014) noted a pervasiveness of power bargaining between older adults and their children in Taiwan. Second, there is a cluster of research on the intergenerational circulation of care, which shows that the mother-in-law role has transformed into one of active grandparenting (Baldassar et al. 2007; Chiu and Ho 2020; Liu and Cook 2020; Livingston 2007). Evidently, the existing scholarship revolves around the two themes of intergenerational disharmony and active grandparenting.

Departing from previous studies of intergenerational relationships, this paper focuses on older women who have resolved intergenerational conflict and completed their grandparenting duty. The research motive of focusing on this particular cohort of older women is to debunk the stereotypical view of a life course with routine achievements and explore uncertainty in the different life stages (Baxter and Evans 2013; Wool 2021), particularly during the era of neoliberalism which expected individuals to carry the responsibility to age well and remain independent (Chan and Lai 2021; Cooper 2011; Lamb 2017). How do these women perform their mothering role in their later years? In addition, this research on mothering practices aims to unravel how the practices are to be facilitated or constrained by political and social situations as well as how individuals make sense of their mothering practice in a particular social context (Barkin and Wisner 2013; Barlow and Chapin 2010; Scheper-Hughes 1985).

This study takes “place” as an entry point to understand the practice of motherhood. In previous works on intergenerational relationships, the research focus tends to be on the space of home, where family members interact and care is delivered. Other than the space of home, the workplace is another arena for investigation to understand how young people and women in a dual-career family negotiate the demands of both family and work (Tsai and Chen 2017; Garey and Hansen 2011). This paper aims to expand the notion of “place” to include social spaces, such as community centers, where older adults take interest classes, to understand the subjectivity of older mothers. My research motive is driven by the trend of the global elder care policy, which has shifted from aging-in-place to aging-in-community. This means that family may not be sufficient enough to provide care and support to older adults; therefore, the community needs to respond to their needs. Instead of just considering community centers as social resources and places for networking, this paper investigates the values indoctrinated at the community centers and examines how these values shape the subjectivity of older mothers.

Why are place and motherhood linked together? Ara Wilson (2012) has analyzed how space is privatized, such as gated communities and shopping malls, and how intimacy is regulated inside these planned spaces through regulations and merchandise. Her notion of infrastructure for intimacy helps to think through the space of community centers, where older adults take interest classes daily. Ara Wilson has also noted that the infrastructure defines and prioritizes certain kinds of intimacies and feelings that are deemed appropriate. Borrowing this analytical lens from Ara Wilson, this paper takes community centers as planned spaces, which have emerged to become a major arena for delivering elder care to relatively healthy older adults. I examine the ideology of aging and care that is circulated in these planned spaces, and I then investigate how the values shape the thoughts of the older mothers and their mothering practices. The analysis will shed light on understanding the effects and actions of older adults, which are assumed to accommodate the needs of the political economy of the state.

The concept of place also facilitates reflections on the changes that take place within the space of home. The older women in this study have been subjected to a social situation of the rising achievements of women in education and career development since the 1990s. Their daughters-in-law are no longer staying at home, as was the case with the older women when they were young. Therefore, these older women are encouraged to have social participation in planned spaces, such as community centers. They are expected to develop their own routine without relying on younger people.

Therefore, the presence of older mothers at the community centers is never arbitrary, but instead driven by the forces of globalization, i.e., the global flows of information and policies of elder care. The national policy of elder care in Taiwan has responded to the call for active aging by opening up planned spaces for older adults, such as community centers. Elder care is no longer limited to older adults who are frail or sick; instead, the notion has expanded to include those who are relatively healthy and have leisure time during the day. The concept of elderscape suggested by Stephen Katz (2020) helps to understand that the presence of older women at the community centers is not accidental but driven by global concepts around active aging. This in itself deserves academic attention, in this case, to understand how older mothers in Taiwan think about their regular attendance at community centers and the sort of knowledge produced and circulated there.

The women in this study were born before the 1960s in Taiwan and have primarily played a caregiving role in their families. Now living in current times where active aging and self-care are endorsed, they are encouraged by the government to enter the public sphere, such as community centers. With the influence of this elder care policy, this paper aims to understand the subjectivity of older mothers in an urban context in East Asia.

The research questions are as follows:

• How do older women perform their mothering role in later life, particularly those who have resolved intergenerational conflict and completed their grandparenting duty?
• What do these older mothers consider to be the qualities of a “good” mother in the later years of their life?
• How do they manage their emotions and expectations for their adult children, particularly in terms of care provision and financial support?
• How do they associate their regular attendance at the community center with their mothering role?

These research questions of motherhood guide this study on the cultural formation of aging and care. This paper proposes that aging and care are not merely about the wellbeing of older adults but about how intergenerational relationships and emotions are shaped by elder care policy in order to accommodate the political economy of the state.

2. Materials and Methods

An ethnographic research approach was adopted to understand the subjectivities of older mothers in urban Taiwan, and the findings of this paper were collected through participant observation at community centers, in-depth interviews, and analysis of newspaper archives. The Research Ethics Committee (REC) of National Tsing Hua University (NTHU) approved the research.

I identified potential community centers and contacted the people who were in charge. I told the people in charge about my research topic, and I received their permission to collect stories from the older adults while serving as a volunteer at the community centers. From November 2021 to June 2022, my research assistant and I volunteered at two community centers in Hsinchu City, Taiwan, twice a week at Community Center A, Wednesday 2 p.m. to 4:30 p.m. and Friday 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., and once a week at Community Center B, Monday 9 a.m. to 11:30 a.m. The staff of the two community centers informed the older adults about our dual roles as both volunteers and researchers. I also explained my research purpose to the older adults when I invited them for individual in-depth interviews. I audio-recorded the interviews with their verbal consent. The research processes fulfilled the requirements of the REC, NTHU.

The volunteer work allowed me to observe the environment and interactions between the older adults, social workers, and interest class instructors. Moreover, I could also observe how knowledge is delivered to older adults. These ethnographic materials are important for understanding the formation of the aging experience in a particular venue. In addition, my regular presence at the community centers also helped to build a trusting relationship with the older adults. Gaining trust was very crucial for conducting in-depth interviews with the older adults in this study because the interviews touched on sensitive topics, such as the amount of financial support that they receive from their adult children. Therefore, I did not aim to interview all of the older adults at the community centers but only collected the life histories of five older mothers with whom I felt a foundation of trust had been built. Although this was not a big sample size, the depth and thickness of the interviews enabled me to analyze their views and feelings.

At the two community centers, Community Centers A and B, the participants ranged from 68 to 93 years old. Twelve participants (one man and eleven women) visited Community Center A, while eighteen participants (four men and fourteen women) visited Community Center B. All were relatively healthy, with most having the ability to walk on their own and clearly express themselves.

This paper mainly relies on the life stories of five older mothers among the participants of the two community centers. All of them live in their own apartment or house. They are financially secure and receive income from their children, rent, or a widow’s pension. Their profile is given in

Table 1. The profile of research participants.

	Name (Pseudonyms for Anonymity)	Age	Living Arrangements	Education	Community Center and Length of Time of Attendance
1.	Bao	88	Widowed and lives alone	Elementary school education	Community Center A, 4 years
2.	Kam	80	Resides with her 82-year-old husband, who has been diagnosed with mild dementia	Elementary school education	Community Center B, 2 years
3.	Shui-yee	80	Resides with her husband and unmarried son	Elementary school education	Community Center B, 2 years
4.	Ming	77	Widowed and lives alone	Junior high school education	Community Center B, 2 years
5.	Ching	68	Resides with her 91-year-old husband and two unmarried daughters	Elementary school education	Community Center A, 6 years

.

With the help of my research assistant, I analyzed Chinese language digital newspaper reports from 1950 to 1980 found at the National Central Library in Taiwan, and an online newspaper archive, the United Daily News Database (udndata.com), to understand the discourse of aging and elder care policy in Taiwan. These three decades were examined because the older women in this study were born and raised during this period of time.

3. Results

3.1. Landscape of Elder Care in Urban Taiwan

Filial piety was the underlying principle that governed the elder care policy in Taiwan prior to the 1970s, which expected adult children to provide care for their parents. In Taiwan, it is a crime of abandonment if adults do not take care of their parents (Lan 2001). Therefore, the government only provided services to homeless older adults. Problems related to aging were perceived by the government as individual problems that were caused by some adults who abandoned their older parents.

The social policy discourse in the 1970s began to be heavily influenced by modernization theory when scholars in the field of social policy returned to Taiwan after studying in the United States and the United Kingdom (Law 2001). The scholars argued that older adults lose their financial means in an industrial society; fewer siblings in nuclear families also created challenges for adult children to care for their parents. Subsequently, aging was considered to be a social issue. Critics in the late 1960s and 1970s urged the government to focus on the welfare of older adults because the younger generation faced many more challenges to fulfill the obligations of taking care of their parents.1 This is a redefined notion of filial piety in which support from the government has become a crucial element to fulfill the obligations.

In addition, the government also introduced social security schemes, health insurance, and private pensions as safety nets for older adults (Lin and Huang 2016). There is also a non-means-tested monthly subsidy of NTD 3000 (approximately USD 100) for older adults, which is part of the national welfare policy. However, this is hardly adequate to sustain daily life expenses. The basic living cost per person in Hsinchu City is NTD 14,230 (approximately USD 443).2 Therefore, if they have no other income, older adults may need to rely on their children for financial support or apply for social security schemes.

In the 1990s, aging-in-place was the major direction of elder care policy (Lin and Huang 2016). Home care services began to include older adults who were not homeless. It was a momentous change as the Taiwanese government admitted that even a “healthy” family may not be able to care for older adults at home. However, familism greatly dictated which households were eligible. Frank Wang (2014) revealed that social workers in Taiwan assess the “need” for home care services by confirming that there were no family members available; this was to ensure that no adult child can shirk his/her familial obligations.

In 2017, the Taiwanese government launched a Long-Term Care 2.0 plan and highlighted community care to further support aging-in-place (Hsu and Chen 2019). Aligning with the WHO policy framework on active aging in 2002, the notion of community care expanded to include those who are relatively healthy. The goal is to encourage them to develop a social life, for example by going to community centers for interest classes, including painting, origami, singing, light exercise, etc. The government touted that aging-related illnesses could be prevented if older adults have an active lifestyle and participated in social activities.

It is noteworthy that familism still underlies the government-supported community centers. The government has produced the rhetoric of the “community center is your second home”.3 This rhetoric reflects the insufficiency of family, particularly insufficient companionship for older adults; therefore, the community center is a second home to meet the needs. It has the subtle underpinnings of intergenerational relationships under a modern aging paradigm.

3.2. Mothering Practices in Early Life

Feminist scholars have long argued how patriarchy shapes family structure and the gendered division of labor (Chodorow 1995; Ehrenreich and Hochschild 2002). In Chinese patrilineal society, the practice of mothering is deeply embedded in patriarchy. The women in this study became mothers in the 1960s and 1970s. Apart from household chores and caring for their children, the older mothers also mentioned caring for their parents-in-law, who became ill later in life. Their generation considers the ability to endure bitterness as a virtue of motherhood, which is supported by Liu and Ku (2015) who found that care provision was an assumed duty for women before the emergence of dual-career families in Taiwan.

A more in-depth conversation with the older mothers revealed how their sense of self is deeply embedded in the patriarchal family structure.

People teased me that I was so pretty but married an old guy who didn’t have much money. My father-in-law became ill just three years after we married and I had to take care of him. I think it was my fate. But anyway, I agreed to the marriage so I shouldn’t complain. I gave my promise to my husband, so I had to stay in the family no matter how hard my life was.

(Ching)

The narrative of Ching shows that her sense of self is embedded in and belongs to the family of her husband. This view of womanhood was also mentioned by Kam during the interview.

My husband has a big family. In the old days, I had a lot of housework to do. I had to prepare meals for more than 20 people. But what could I say? Even if I ran away, where could I go to? I had no place to go. If I died, then there would be no place for me.

(Kam)

Kam’s story was intriguing as she mentioned that there would be no place for her (before and after death) if she left her husband. The patriarchal ideology assumes that a woman must marry and then she would belong to her husband’s family. Otherwise, she becomes a lonely wandering ghost after death because no family members will pay respects to her. The above narratives show that the sense of self of the older mothers is embedded in the patriarchal family structure, in which they fulfill their role by delivering direct care to their family members, such as taking care of the father-in-law and preparing meals for all people.

3.2.1. Emotional Care: Learning Motherhood in Later Life

The older mothers in this study were no longer active in providing direct care to their children or grandchildren. They shared with me that they previously experienced conflicts with their children and daughters-in-law, such as regarding the distribution of housework when they pressured their children to marry, and due to different living habits. However, they now avoid or have resolved the conflicts, for instance, by living alone or accepting their adult children as individuals. Their decision to live alone or accept their circumstances may sound like common sense; however, the following findings based on an analysis of newspaper archives will show a redefined notion of motherhood that has been promoted since the 1970s when economic development and the emergence of dual-career families created a new landscape of intergenerational relationships.

The news reports in the 1970s suggested that mutual communication between adults and their older parents is crucial for familial harmony.4 The media critics argued that the conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are due to communication issues and their conflicts could be reconciled if both adult children (including the daughter-in-law) and parents are willing to listen to each other. This was a groundbreaking suggestion since the idea of communicating with the daughter-in-law was foreign to most of the older adults in patrilineal families in the 1970s. Older women were encouraged to change themselves and refrain from intervening in the life of their children.5 The notion that older mothers should learn to adjust their expectations and give emotional support to their children was a redefined notion of motherhood. The ethnographic content of how the older mothers in this study provided emotional care to their children will be discussed in Section 4.1.

3.3. At the Community Centers

This section will examine how the older mothers began their routine at the community centers. In addition, ethnographic materials are provided to understand the activities that are taking place at the community centers, as well as the values attached to them.

3.3.1. Establishing Routines

The older women in this study stated that they were verbally invited by neighbors of a similar age or the Village Head6 to visit the community center. Both their peers and the Village Head had some knowledge about the family conditions of the older women. For example, they knew which older women lived alone, and which older women did not need to care for their grandchildren anymore and had nothing particular to do during the day. They then approached the women and invited them to visit the community center. The invitations were persuasive and loving, and the benefits were elaborated (e.g., having companionship would be much better than their boring lifestyle). The term “boring” corresponds to the active aging paradigm in which older adults should take responsibility to stay active in order to remain healthy.

Ching recalled that a similar-age female neighbor suggested that she should attend interest classes at the community center. This neighbor knew that Ching’s grandchildren did not require her care any longer which led her to think that Ching’s life was boring. Therefore, she persuaded Ching to visit the community center, which Ching subsequently did and continued to do so.

Throughout my field research, the older women shared a similar story, that is, the urge to learn a skill or a hobby. For example, Ming started to visit the community center on a regular basis after enrolling in an interest class that taught older adults how to use smartphones. She said that learning to use technology would allow her to keep abreast through a smartphone which has become popular even among older adults. Thus, Ming is now able to make video calls to maintain contact with her grandchildren during the COVID-19 pandemic.

While they agreed that learning was beneficial, they also indicated that the interest class should not be too challenging; otherwise, they would not be able to stand the intensity. Bao’s neighbor advised her to join an English class, but she ended up enrolling in a Japanese class because her son told her that English was difficult and Japanese might be easier for her. Due to Japanese colonial rule until the end of World War II, it was not uncommon for Taiwanese older adults, such as those of Bao’s age, to know some basic Japanese.

The older mothers in this study described the relationship with other older adults as “classmates”, which meant that they were at the community center for classes and learning. But since their age and abilities varied, some would need more assistance from the teachers. This then created discontent among them. Ching (68 years old) was the youngest in this study. She frankly told me that she found some people whose abilities in class activities, such as painting, origami, and board games, were not as good as hers, and the teachers then spent more time on these people. She felt that she was neglected by the teachers sometimes.

It is noteworthy that this kind of community center resonates with school culture. The Taiwanese government requires the community centers to offer a variety of interest classes from Monday to Friday.7 In Community Center A, a social worker takes attendance in the morning. The social worker then contacts any absent individuals. Therefore, the community center is not a free space where older adults can come or leave at their leisure. Instead, they have to follow rules, such as punctuality. The seniority of older adults is compromised by their “student” status. In addition, there is a log book for communication between the older adults and their families. In each daily entry, the social worker evaluates the older adult based on his/her observations by checking boxes that indicate whether the older adult has a “good”, “fair”, or “not good” rating for three aspects, including physical condition, social tendencies, and participation in activities. The older adult then has to obtain a signature from his or her family member to show that the family member is aware of the information recorded in the log book.8

Rules are set up with good intentions; however, they may create tensions among the older adults, particularly when there are people who cannot meet the expectations. At Community Center A, there was an 86-year-old woman who had a problem with her sleep schedule. Sometimes, she came very late, i.e., two hours late, and classes were almost done. I once heard Ching and other people tease her about her persistent lateness. The social worker was aware of the teasing behavior but did not intervene directly. The rule of punctuality supposedly aims to help the older adults to form a regular social life at the community center; however, it turns out to become a source of tension among the older adults when someone cannot meet the requirement.

3.3.2. Self-Care

At the community centers, the physical body of the older adults is subjected to scrutiny, including the daily measurement of blood pressure, and the documentation of performance by the social worker in the interest classes. Apart from the health measurement and documentation, both the social worker and interest class instructors often reminded the older adults to continue to physically move in order to stay healthy. On my first day as a volunteer at Community Center A, the social worker briefly informed me about the health condition of each older adult. The social worker said that I should encourage them to be independent, for example by filling their own water bottle and lining up for meals. She said that the goal of encouraging the older adults to be independent was to give them physical movements so that they could stay healthy. The input of the social worker aligns with the active aging paradigm that too much assistance given to older adults may lead to dependency.

Reminders to “keep moving” were often announced. I heard a social worker say the following publicly to the older adults:

The health conditions of (names of those who were former community center members) got worsened during the past months since they could not come to the community center due to the close down during the COVID-19 pandemic.9 Now you have to come here every day in order to stay healthy.

The older adults were told that it was their responsibility to remain healthy, which was to go to the community center on a regular basis.

The social worker also showed YouTube videos of health information to the older adults. One of them was about how older adults could stave off ailments through healthy eating. Although health advice and information were delivered to older adults at the community center, it was not surprising that the older adults themselves had their own thoughts about the advice. Bao exclaimed out loud that “when people reach 70, they just get all sorts of ailments!” Her reaction shows that while she agrees with the video that older adults are susceptible to a range of common ailments, she does not think that they could really avoid them because the ailments come with age. On another occasion when the older adults chatted about diet and food options at the community center, Bao stated that she did not deliberately avoid any particular type of food. She proudly shared her health philosophy with others that a diet with a variety of foods was healthier than one with food restrictions. At the institutional level, older adults are asked to accept responsibility for self-care. At the individual level, the older adults have their own agency and view the situation differently. After all, they are indeed taking care of themselves.

4. Discussion: Motherhood in Later Life

The routine that the older mothers have established at the community center is not just a routine; instead, the routine involves self-care. The routine and its attached value have formed feelings, that is, how older adults should behave and manage their expectations toward adult children. The following section will discuss how the older mothers interpret their routine at the community center and its meaning in their relationship with their adult children.

4.1. Emotional Care: “I Can Take Care of Myself”

In Section 3.2.1, I have delineated the discourse of emotional care between mothers and their adult children since the 1970s. In this ethnographic study, I found that the older mothers make use of their routine visits to the community center as kin labor to enable positive emotional exchanges with their adult children. For instance, Ming stated that her married daughter (in her mid-fifties) recently retired and has more time to spend with Ming. Her daughter suggested that Ming could move in and live with her. However, Ming rejected the invitation and informed her daughter that she was not bored and enjoyed her daily routine at the community center. She emotionally took care of her daughter by showing that she was thriving at the community center and so her daughter did not need to worry about her. I argue that the emotional care provided by Ming to her daughter is not any guidance given to the child; instead, it is Ming’s independence and self-care. Ming described her ideal family situation; that is, she takes care of herself, and her children take care of themselves. This ideal family situation was realized through her routine at the community center.

Thus, regular attendance and the log book both serve to show adult children that the parent is thriving at the community center. By maintaining regular attendance at the community center, the mothers believe that their children would not need to worry about them, as in the case of Shui-yee:

My son told me that if I am not doing well, he would feel pressure and cannot focus on his work. He said that he wants me to be healthy and happy…he would be happy if I am happy.

The notion of self-care is emphasized here; Shui-yee has to stay healthy and happy so that her son is happy. In other words, Shui-yee is a good mother if she is able to take care of herself; otherwise, her son will suffer. Shui-yee informed me that she enjoyed herself at the community center. This revelation was supported through my observations; she participated in interest classes, including singing, and responded to the questions of the class instructors. Therefore, her participation at the community center is not merely a routine but a mothering practice—to emotionally take care of her son by attending the community center classes regularly, so that her son does not worry about her.

None of the older women in this study expect that their adult children will serve them like how they had served their mother-in-law. They mentioned the potential need to rely on children in the event that their physical conditions decline in the future. However, there are no expectations that their children or their partners would provide the same level of care as they had given their in-laws. For example, Ming said:

Our generation lived through all sorts of hardships; however, the younger generation is not like us. They put more emphasis on themselves and enjoying life. They just hire foreign helpers to look after their parents.

Ming expressed mixed feelings about the trend of hiring foreign helpers to care for older adults in Taiwan. Caregiving was supposed to be a filial act. However, she also understood the physical demands of caring for a severely ill elderly person because she lived the experience herself as a caregiver for her mother-in-law. The phenomenon of hiring foreign helpers reflects the evolving definition of filial piety in Chinese families, which Pei-Chia Lan (2001, 2002) described as “subcontracting filial piety” when adult children employ helpers to fulfill their filial piety duties.

The older mothers in this study mentioned that emotional exchange and support are important filial gestures. They defined filial acts as listening to them, phoning them, and visiting during holidays. Shui-yee was living with her husband and an unmarried son. Her other two sons were married and did not reside with them. They hired a foreign caretaker to care for Shui-yee and her husband. Shui-yee said: “I think my three sons are good. They are filial sons. They respect me. We chat and enjoy our time together when they come to visit me.”

Subjected to the self-care ideology, the older mothers have learned to enjoy the emotional aspects of their relationship with their adult children, such as chats and visits during holidays. Their routine at the community center serves as a cultural symbol to demonstrate that they are thriving, and so their children would not need to worry about them. Motherhood is a process of learning despite aging.

4.2. Money

Bao and Ching are financially independent and enjoy a stable income. Bao has a veteran widow’s monthly pension, while Ching receives rent from a property that belongs to her husband. However, Kam, Shui-yee, and Ming rely on their children for money. In the study of older mothers in an East Asian context, who were not covered by a monthly pension, financial support from children is a crucial aspect for understanding how they make sense of being a “good” mother by not asking for money beyond their basic needs.

Kam, Shui-yee, and Ming emphasized that they do not ask for more beyond their needs. Ming did not give details on how much she received for her living expenses but just that she would ask her son for funds if she ran out of money. She also stated that other older adults such as herself who spent most of their time at the community center do not spend much money. In fact, the community center provided a simple lunch. She also shared with me how she maintained her health by practicing a Chinese medical massage which was very beneficial for her health as it was an effective treatment for chronic illnesses common to older adults. She joined a volunteer group that consisted of retirees and learned the massage techniques from them. When she did not feel well, she would ask the group members to massage her (which does not incur any cost) and vice versa. Ming informed me that the massages reduce her medical bills.

Kam did not mind telling me about the amount of money that she received from her son for herself and her husband, which is NTD 30,000 (approximately USD 1000) each month. This amount was about double the basic living cost per person in Hsinchu City or NTD 14,230; therefore, it should be sufficient for an older couple not needing to pay rent. Therefore, Kam was also aware that this is not a small amount of money and would not further burden her son financially:

Whenever my son bought food or anything for me, I would pay him back. My son is already giving us NTD 30,000. How can I ask him to pay for other things? I don’t like it (taking more).

To these older mothers, who rely on their children for money, asking for more financial support from children might be harmful to the mother–child relationship. Even though their children might be willing to pay for their daily and medical expenses, the mothers consider the financial support as a burden on their children. They strive to limit their daily expenses, and even save up for future medical expenses.

4.3. Mother’s Love for Unmarried Daughters

This section will specifically address relationships with unmarried daughters. I will use the experience of Ching to illustrate how the notion of self-care is extended to unmarried daughters. Ching has two unmarried daughters who are in their late 40s and early 50s, respectively. Ching’s story is noteworthy because there is an increasing number of individuals who choose to remain single not only in Taiwan but also in other East Asian societies. For those who are well-educated and middle-class, remaining single could be a personal lifestyle choice. However, it is another story for those who are not middle class. Ching’s relationship with her two unmarried daughters will shed light on understanding gender, social class, and aging.

At the community center, Ching often showed us pictures on her smartphone, mostly those of her younger unmarried daughter and her eating out together in restaurants and traveling, including local travel in Taiwan and a trip to Japan. Her younger unmarried daughter has a full-time job and lives with her maternal family, which includes her older unmarried sister. During the interview, I asked Ching who paid the bills when she went out with her unmarried daughter. Ching said, “I pay for myself. She pays for herself. She gives me some money every month (for food and utility bills) since she is living here. But apart from this, I do not ask them to pay anything for me.” I followed up to ask, “Isn’t it a filial practice to pay for the mother?” Ching replied, “Her income isn’t very high. How could I ask for so much?”

The older unmarried daughter stopped working when her mental health issues increased in severity. She did not have a regular paid job. At home, she was responsible for caring for her father, who was 90 years old, when Ching was at the community center during the day. In addition, she also took Ching to the wet market in her scooter every morning. Ching stated that she gave NTD 1000 (approximately USD 33) for gas to this daughter every month. She said that this daughter did not have any income; therefore, she did not want her daughter to pay for gas. I asked Ching whether she worried about her unmarried daughters. She said:

Of course I worry about them but worrying is useless. What I can do now is to save up more money so that I can leave them with more money after I die.

This comment also touched on the aging issue of her two daughters. Although the two daughters were still middle age, Ching had already given thought to their financial problems in their senior years. Ching had a stable income from rental property and was confident that she could age well without relying on anyone. However, she was less confident about her two daughters because one was earning a low income and the other had no income. It was very likely that their income might even decline in an ageist job market. In addition, Ching had no hope of a marriage which could provide her daughter with financial stability because Ching was aware of the low marriageability of middle-aged women in society.

In summary, Ching not only prepared for her own aging, but also is doing the same for her two unmarried daughters, who have not yet achieved a middle-class social status or might never do so. She tries to alleviate their burden by not accepting financial help from them and plans to leave money to them after she passes. Ching projects her own notion of self-care to her daughters; that is, one can still age well if one is well prepared.

5. Conclusions

This paper investigates the subjectivity of older mothers by examining the shifting ideas of filial piety and motherhood in recent decades, and the infrastructure for intimacy, that is, the global elder care policy that targets relatively healthy older adults and encourages them to go to community centers. The mothering practices are contextualized during the life course and address the transition of older mothers from the early years to the later years of their life, during which they have to adapt to changes to their (diminishing) role at home as well as the increasing responsibility of self-care placed on older adults.

In the everyday practices of the study participants, mothering is no longer about providing care to adult children or grandchildren; instead, it is about self-care. The narratives of the older women in this study demonstrate how they take care of their bodies through preventative means, such as daily blood pressure measurements, and establishing a routine at the community center.

5.1. Mothers’ Emotion Work in Later Life

The older mothers in this study did not have much opportunity to develop their personal potential or pursue adventures when they were young. They became wives and mothers between 16 and 24 years old. Their sense of self was embedded in a family collective; that is, their primary role was to take care of family members, and as a mother, they were expected to endure bitterness for their children. But now, these older mothers were encouraged by the elder care policy to develop hobbies and establish a routine outside home. To the older mothers in this study, who achieved an education at the elementary level (only Ming has a high school education), this was a brand new idea since they were not given the opportunity to enroll in interest classes or develop a life outside the home when they were young. These older mothers were now encouraged to develop a newer self; that is, they should not focus on their children’s lives anymore but on themselves.

Self-care is not merely about physical health but also about emotions. The routine that the older mothers have established at their community center serves as a positive emotional exchange with their children. In addition, they are expected to express a positive affect and become a “carefree” mother. The routine at the community center and the positive affect become the qualities of a “good” mother. Otherwise, their boring lifestyle or sadness would burden their children and might prevent their children from investing all of their time and energy in the economic market. I conclude that emotional care for the children is about how the mothers take care of themselves.

This paper provides an alternative perspective to reflect on the concept of self-reliance against the backdrop of an active aging paradigm, in which the value of self-care is heavily embraced. Previous studies of self-reliance in intergenerational relationships in East Asian societies indicate that it is defined as “a withdrawal from parent-offspring reciprocations as are prescribed by societal norms” and suggests minimal contact between older parents and children (Tsai and Yang 2017, p. 25). That is, older adults seek social resources and support outside the home instead of seeking help from their adult children; therefore, the contact between parents and adult children is minimal. This paper argues against this notion and proposes that self-reliance can produce a positive meaning. Based on the ethnographic findings in this study, the older mothers interpret self-care as being self-reliant; that is, they refrain from asking for money or help from their adult children beyond their basic needs. But still, being self-reliant can produce a positive meaning—the older mothers believe that their efforts to become self-reliant, including establishing a routine outside the home and refraining from seeking companionship from their children, are their primary way of carrying out their duty of motherhood.

It is noteworthy that the newer self of the older mothers is not individualistic but remains collective and familial. While the older mothers enjoy their time at the community centers, they also do it for their children. The values of self-care and self-reliance promoted at the community centers encourage a new form of intergenerational intimacy that fits the social and economic circumstances. The sense of self of these older mothers is still strongly embedded in their families.

5.2. Infrastructure for Intimacy

In analyzing mothering practice in an East Asian urban context, this paper has responded to the call of feminism by emphasizing the “public” space of community centers in a study of “domestic” intimacy (Wilson 2012) in an East Asian urban context. The global and public discourses of active aging urge the state to open up planned spaces for older adults. These planned spaces are elderscapes, in which the presence of older people is facilitated by both the global discourse of aging and national elder care policy. These elderscapes are not value-free but suggest a new form of care, that is, self-care. The older mothers associate this value with their mothering role and emphasize positive emotional exchanges via phone calls, holiday visits, dining out, or traveling together with their adult children. The gendered expectations imposed on daughters-in-law and intervening in the life of adult children are perceived to be archaic and even destructive to the mother–child relationship.

It is noteworthy that the older mothers in this study seldom publicly talk about their mothering experiences or personal feelings at the community center. Most of the time, it is not their role as mothers that is addressed but their role as students; they come for classes and are expected to leave when classes are done. Classes are mostly lectures, or the older adults are asked to work on their own piece of painting or origami. The occasions of sharing personal issues are only possible when they are in a small group (three to four people) for class activities. However, these occasions are not frequent. Although the older adults seldom publicly talk about their mothering practices at the community center, this paper provides a perspective to understand how the value of self-care, which is indoctrinated at the community centers, has shaped the older women’s motherhood and their relationship with their adult children.

As noted by Sarah Lamb (2000), there is a tendency in motherhood studies to focus on women with reproductivity. This paper responds to Lamb’s call and contributes to expanding the notion of motherhood by elucidating how older women carry out their mothering practices. This study not only examines the evolving roles and kin labor of mothers during their different life stages, but also argues that the global ideology of aging and self-care could incite new definitions of motherhood. Similar to young mothers, these older women are learning how to be a “good” mother regardless of their age. They have the agency to embody their motherhood even though they are deemed to have a mundane routine and are no longer responsible for familial duties. Their daily practices of self-care stem from their thoughts about motherhood in the past and the evolving public discourses of aging and care.

Although this ethnographic study has filled the academic gap about motherhood in later life in an East Asian urban context, it has a couple of limitations. First, the sample size is relatively small, and no general patterns can be found yet. Second, this is an exploratory study of older mothers, whose children and grandchildren no longer need their care. Given the exploratory nature of this study, there is not much room for making comparisons with previous studies. With regard to this issue, I propose continuing research on this topic and expanding to other East Asian societies, as well as looking for more ethnographic materials and behavioral patterns, which would further enrich the academic discussions about motherhood in later life in an East Asian urban context.